September 04, 2005


I never in my wildest dream thought that an elephant, a pack of hyenas, a hectare of forest and a human being could all be stuffed into a single matchbox. Well, they CAN, you know!

Enough of that stupid example. I’m now going to vent my exasperation, dejection and disappointment here- about the two most horrible weeks I’ve just had. I’ve cribbed and cried to friends and family . now let blogsville hear it!

To tell the truth I don’t want to put this up. But then I thought I HAVE to post it, to serve as a reminder of my stupidities! Here goes…

Piled up a helluva lot of work on my head.and ended up infuriating all of my profs who’ve declared I’m IRRESPONSIBLE!
Wanted to VERY badly do the sympo work for my dept. Did a bit too. But due to point one, the responsibility’s been shifted and I like a kid sat down and cried!
Did something that I did not expect to do at least for the next few years. And I am confused regarding the merits of my act. Hasty unthinking me!!!
But the BEST part is nothing has changed. It’s all as if it never happened.
“Things change. People change. But some bonds remain forever.”
Long live friendship!!!
Have been fighting, cribbing, crying all the time!
Had to study for my assessment from scratch and ended up staying late into the night.
Had to finish my design in less than a day and ended up getting lousy marks and now have to re-do it!
Going to college on Saturdays too for practice for the zonal NASA(National Association for the Students of Architecture).
Been feeling miserable due to my rising expenditure!!!
Been feeling miserable cos a few people have been treating me like filth. Its always like this. I go to the ends of the world for friends and they always throw me away! I’ve felt miserable due to two such different incidents.
I’ve just realized what a lousy dumb idiotic specimen I am. The past few days have exposed all my negatives, not only to me, but to the WORLD!
Lost my friend’s design sheets. He took it bravely cos he had a copy of his design. Go own up to the prof. Get jacked majorly. Try stepping down from all responsible positions cos my confidence on my abilities is low. Prof asks me not to be a loser and escapist. Realise folly. Go to Computer room. Lo, my friend’s sheets are there! Relief! Exasperation! Confusion!
My bad memory power became worst! Forgot deadlines. Forgot books. Forgot where I was after taking my friend’s design sheet. I sadly asked,” ma’am, do you remember where I went after getting the sheets? Which day was it? What time?” to get an incredulous reply,” At 18 you’re this forgetful???”
Made a fool of myself repeatedly!

Bad is too light a word! It was the worst.. no most WORST two weeks! Things are no better now. No cell recharge for a while, I’m bunking the whole of this week for practice, have to clear my desk, buy my friends, brother and sister(all buddays coming one by one) gifts for their birthday when I’m broke!

The only good thing is that a little girl sitting next to me in the bus yesterday, as I was going to college, made me very happy. She had come with her very sweet grandmother who was sitting a little way off. The two of us were closing our noses as this old man in front of us was smoking a beedi. The smell was awful and even his wife was complaining. Both of us closed our noses at the same time and we found it funny for no reason. And we giggled. I found her very sweet and she had the most pleasant face amongst all the girls I know(in guys, it goes to my classmate Faheem!). As I got down, I would have waved and yelled atleast 5-6 byes! We were instant friends! And somehow the stress and depression of the two horrible weeks melted miraculously. From then, it’s been better comparatively.

I just realized that with all my faults, all my stupidity and all my hastiness, it’s still easy to make me happy! It just takes a friendly smile from someone around and a smile back from me for my miseries to melt…

Thank you girl, wherever, whoever, whatever you are! I’ll nEVER forget you, nor that beatific smile of yours!



Anonymous said...

hey wake up and look around there r ppl all around u smiling going thru far Far worse..sumhow they manage to... i am sure ur face is too pretty to Not let it smile..and i bet its over-al the bad i mean.

Sheks said...

LADY OLIVER TWIST dissatisfied.

Anonymous said...

The world is NOT you!! everyone1 has his own probs/worries. Just for one mistake, u neednt carry the "irresponsible" tag as a life sentence. Relax and take things one at a time, and it IS human to make mistakes, be it 1 or 1008 at a time. Think that the other guy is a bigger fool and just complete what u start.

Vinesh said...

Having been in similar situations before, and expecting more to come, I will never tell you "C'mon cheer up!" I know it's not as easy as that.

But yes, at the back of your mind, nest the thought that you ARE gonna feel better, things WILL look start looking up.

It's very sweet how the little girl changed your mood so quickly! Try babies, or pets. They work sometimes!

Vinesh said...


I don't see your email id anywhere. I'm not sure if I have it in my address book too.

I need to send you email. Mail me at:

Vani Viswanathan said...

hmm...i'm now experiencing sth close to what you are experiencing now! doing bad in things i never expected i would....but c'mon, grit your teeth and go through it....isn't a nice a.r.rahman song or our farewell pics enough to cheer ya up??!! they WORK, i tell ya!!

Anonymous said...

Too bad that the virtual world separates us. Otherwise, I would have given you a hug.

Robert C.Edwards: Never exaggerate your faults. Your friends will attend to that.

Dodie Smith:

Noble deeds and hot baths are the best cures for depression.

Er- trust me on the last one. ;))

© Dryad's Peak
Maira Gall