When I declared that 2008 was by far the best year of my life, it was meant to be a thank you to you. Not any indication to make 2009 miserable from start.
When I keep screaming out in happiness declaring there couldn't be a more contended girl in life, it really doesn't mean you need to make me discontent.
I am being appreciative of you here. And when I say 'Life couldn't be better', maybe I'm overlooking the one million troubles you actually put me through and be magnanimous enough to look at the bright side.
Kindly understand, God, that I'm also trying to be nice to you, putting up with all your whims and fancies and DESPITE everything, appreciating you and your given life to the fullest AND spreading the cheer.
You better keep this in mind and be a little less cruel to me.
2009 couldn't have begun more horribly.
R.I.P. Jaymala Ma'am... We're really sad to lose you!
And to everything else that already seems so screwed up, please get better. I'm a die hard optimist. I genuinely try to make people happy. But honestly, if you are going to make me as moody and as crabby as you've already made me today, God, I swear I'm not gonna be any better at my universal cheerleading. In fact, I'm afraid, I'm gonna screw up the whole work and make myself and the world around me more miserable. Unfortunately, dear God, just as how you have given me the power to spread the cheer, you've also given me the power to seep in depression. Kindly, I beg you, don't force me to do that by making me so crabby!
It is a new year and it is not like I have high hopes of it. All I asked you even yesterday was to just sail me through everything the same way as you did through 2008. But one day into this year and I'm feeling awfully lonely, cruelly crushed and scared like a cat-chased-mouse!
This is my S.O.S.
Don't make things worse! And give me my flicker of hope so I can hold it like a beacon for the rest of the world. I genuinely wanna make this place better. But first, don't snatch off my trust and hope..
I still love you, God!