June 30, 2007

The girl within

(an attempted short story)

Smriti stood there in front of the mirror... She was wearing a faded orangish pink kurti over her jeans! Somehow this is not what she wanted to wear that day! She was tired of her usual style- a kurti over a jean or a salwar kameez set! She did not even feel like wearing any of her skirts and tops! I mean- she was going on her first official engagement and she hadto look smart and at the same time absolutely gorgeous!

And the kurti did not make her look gorgeous! She looked plain Jane and 'usual'!!!

USUAL! oh! She was tired of it! She dragged out of her cupboard that lovely top she had so dreamily bought at a sale... the very top she mostly was never allowed to wear as it made her look good!

She was going to some 5 star hotel for a conference. Big shots were to be there... all lovely ladies in the latest trend setting designs! And she- dressed like she'd emergd from some other planet!

She stopped thinking. Took that lovely top, put it on!

She hesitated before moving in front of the mirror! Maybe it really was tight! Or maybe... it just did not suit her!

She hesitated for a second more!
she stepped in front of the mirror and ...

She was walking on the road to catch an auto! Everyone was giving her a second look! "WHO was this babe?! WHO is it? I've never seen her EVER in thsi area!!!" kind of looks! They were giving her approving glances! NOT lecherous looks but looks of- "oh! You're a babe too, you know!" type.

And they were giving HER the looks too! And not just her pretty friend who ALWAYS got those looks! They weren't thinking of her as someone who merged with the background.. as someone who was so girl-next-doorish that you could think of her only as a 'kiddo' or 'sister' or 'just another of those gals'! She looked NICE! And she KNEW it! She KNEWshe looked the best on the street that moment! She KNEW!

And she wished she could hold this one moment of beautiful girlish pride to herself forever! She never could dress up this way all the time! She will go back to comfort over looks! And she'd STILL want people to like her the way she is and NOT due to how she looks and dresses up and all! She'll look nice, maybe occassionally even pretty! And she'll look smart or niceeveryday too! But that first 'golden' hour of 'best' will never find a more precious substitute!

The girl within a girl seldom finds a face... It hides... for fear of being vulnerable and hurt and ridiculed!


Nithya said...

Neat story Sandhya :)

I guess every single homely/chamathu chamathu girl, wants to unleash the girl within, but the constant fear of "being vulnerable and hurt and ridiculed" overwhelms her...

Aprilslady said...

Smriti has ALWAYS been a beautiful girl!!! :*

Ramya Shankar said...

I feel every "tamil" girl gets these thoughts into her head. To expose that vulnerable side is something all girls are a little hesitant about.

Beautiful ! :)

Kush said...

Nice story there Sandy... Liked it : )

You have fine narrative ability... Write longer stories! :)


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Maira Gall